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swehBad mood. Pissed off. Grumpy.
And I don't know why.
Wanna wear my collar. NEED to wear my collar. Can't. At work. Fuck.
Feeling a little bit self destructive. Want to feel trapped and unable to escape. Tied down, enclosed and ignored. Want to be pissed on and degraded. Want to do something irrevocable... dye my hair or something. Dunno.
Some of these things are not me as I see myself. I would probably hate some of it. But I want it! I want to destroy myself, hurt myself, force myself to be other than what I am.
I'm fucked up today.
And I don't know why.
Wanna wear my collar. NEED to wear my collar. Can't. At work. Fuck.
Feeling a little bit self destructive. Want to feel trapped and unable to escape. Tied down, enclosed and ignored. Want to be pissed on and degraded. Want to do something irrevocable... dye my hair or something. Dunno.
Some of these things are not me as I see myself. I would probably hate some of it. But I want it! I want to destroy myself, hurt myself, force myself to be other than what I am.
I'm fucked up today.
